Wednesday, October 27, 2010

I'm Not Super Woman

I seriously want to break down and cry. I love being a mom, and I love being a wife, but I rarely get a break. I cannot do everything on my own. I just can't. I try really hard to please everybody. I'm in mommy mode 24/7 and I don't believe it's healthy to be around your child all the time. A mother needs time to herself as well.

Michael, and I'm sure some other people would say different. I know Michael would. I'm sorry, but you go to work 5 days a week, and get paid for doing your job. I work 7 days a week, 24/7, 365. When the heck do I get to sick down and take a break?

Oh, I have a MASSIVE kidney infection that I let go too long, so now my kidneys are probably damaged. You know why I didn't go to the doctor? A: Because I felt like I am an inconvenience, and B, because I have a baby to take care of. I put myself last all the time. I either put myself last or without, and honestly, I don't mind, but sometimes I want something in return. Be it a whole day to myself just to relax, read a book, or nap. SOMETHING! 

I swear, I don't ask for anything. I always put everybody ahead of myself because I like to make my family happy. I do it, because if I don't, then I feel awful and selfish. I don't even like to complain about it. I feel this is what's expected of me. I'll admit I'm not the most organized person in the world. I try though, having a billion things to juggle at once is hard.

I'm thinking of making a schedule and putting it on the wall somehwere in the kitchen. Doing the laundry one day, the living room the next, and so on. I think if I just had a balanced daily schedule, I could accomplish a lot more and feel less overwhelmed. Though that does not substitute 'me' time. 

I don't want it to sound like Michael is a bad father or husband, because he isn't, but he doesn't realize being a SAHM is more than it seems. And that goes to all moms and dads who work outside the home. Being a SAHM doesn't mean just sitting around and doing nothing. Some days, may be lazy ( at least for me ) but most days, it's cleaning, cooking, playing, and tending to our childs/rens beck and call. 

I also realize I'm not the only mother who goes through this, but I'm one of those women who talk about it, and to let them know they are not alone. I'm a complainer, but I'm real. That's who I am; take it or leave it.


  1. Are you inside my head!? AMEN! YOU NAILED IT! STORY of my Freaking LIFE!

    Oh and little tip for wonderful hubbies that just need a reminder. Stop one thing you do for him. I stopped washing his clothes once. He got mad but he did understand a little. It isn't completely better but at least he acknowledged the issues.

    Which if you read my blog the other day, I made Garrett make dinner by himself, ZERO help. Good thing the man knows how to grill. He kept asking me, do we have this, how do I do this... I said, DUDE this is all you buddy :) Now we are going to start making it a weekly thing. Every Wednesday I get a break from the kitchen.

  2. You are a super woman. All stay at home moms who actually take care of their kids are!
    There are days when I'm just pooped. between taking care of Aurora and all her basic need and then I also teach her 2 hours out of the day? omgoodness. I used to play video games and all that HA HA HA not anymore!
    But that is honestly okay. It's for the greater good. Just remember that everything you do for little nor it's shaping her for her future. & since you are such a great sahm she will have you to thank when you see her have a great future!
    I think Mrs Emily needs a long bubble bath! You should have Micheal watch her tonight while you enjoy yourself. I'm sure he will be able to handle her for 30 mins! If not, boy needs a bum kickin lol

  3. Kristen, I'm glad to know I'm not alone. I knew I wasn't, but sometimes it feels that way. You are not the first person to recommend going on strike lol.

    And thanks, Chels. I wish more people, mainly those who don't work from home understood how hard being a sahp can be. It's no cake walk.
    And you're right, I need a bubble bath. I can't tell you the last time I got to shave my legs! TMI, but it's true lol.

  4. I am also a SAHM. These Twins are going to kill me! lol
    I do not get many breaks. It is Extremely hard to not have many adult conversations. Wednesday, Thursday and Friday After 6pm until the next morning, That is MY TIME. My Kids don't ask me for anything, and the Babies are taken care of by my husband. I told them if they don't let me be human with needs of my own that I may end up being that Momma that runs away for the weekend.. ( i was kidding). I do understand those women tho. humans can only tolerate so much stress before they blow like an atomic bomb. If your not healthy, your at risk of not being there for those that need you. You HAVE to find that time. It's not a want it's a need like breathing air, or drinking water. Set 2 days for yourself a week, tell your husband that you need 3-4 hours of this time for YOU. and stop feeling guilty for taking that time. feel guilty for not allowing yourself to keep a healthy mind and soul. ;)

    Hugz from Washington DC.

  5. Thanks so much for the encouraging words. That says everything I've basically wanted to say to my husband. He's a great husband, but he just doesn't get it sometimes. Thank you for understanding. it's nice to know I'm not alone =0)