Sunday, October 3, 2010

HI!

It's been some time since I last wrote. I've neglected this blog for too long. I need to start updating at least once a week. I know family likes to read it, so I'll try and do a better job at updating. 
Anyways, Nora is now 6 and half months old. WHAT?! Seriously, time is flying. I know the next few will fly by too. She sits up on her own now. Not all the time, because it's still new to her, but she does quite often. She is SOo close to crawling. She gets up on all fours perfectly, then lays on her belly. I know she knows what to do. It's just a matter of time. She says, "Mama ( she said that first ), and for the first time today said Dada. She is so smart.  She is babbling up a storm as of late. I love it. She is becoming her own little person.
As for me, I'm doing okay. I battled REALLY hard with ppd. I still deal with it from time to time, mainly anxiety, but it's getting better. They say the first year of parenthood is the hardest. I've said this many times before, I believe my miscarriages really caused me to have ppd. I was not able to bond with Nora during my pregnancy. It hurts me to say that, but I'm bonding with her more now, and I enjoy it. I love with with all of my heart. I recently found god and I'm devoting my life to Jesus, and with him in my life again, I'd be lost. My husband is as understanding as he can be. I know he doesn't get it, but he tries to. He's an amazing father and I could never ask for anything more.
I'm dealing with a lot of demons from my past, and it's been some challenge to get deal with them. I still have a long ways to go, but I'm trying. I'm really make an effort. I've been doing a lot of soul searching and I think maybe I need to stop and just go with the flow. I definitely think to much and I think that causes me to go into a deep depression. I do want to go to college in the next couple years though. I just want to give my daughter the best life I can. I don't know any mother that doesn't want that for her child. She is my world and I would do anything for her.
Can you all believe it's already October? I sure can't. Where did the year go? I'm ready for the cooler weather, time with family, and food. I love the holidays. I think I'm going to attempt to make fudge this Christmas. I was too tired last Christmas, and I was afraid I'd screw it up. It's not easy to make, and I'm kind of a novice when it comes to baking from scratch, but practice makes perfect I suppose.
Well, time to get ready for bed. Have a great week.

2 comments:

  1. Welcome back to blog world =) your daughter is so beautiful! I think blogging helped me keep PPD away ( just a little).

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  2. Thank you =0)

    and blogging, writing in general helps me. I can't wait to start getting back into it.

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